inhibitors.

sometimes i wish i was smaller. that i would be able to curl up and hide away from people and things around me... its wierd, how god gives us hearts for different things... i have a heart for people and for being of use to people, and it seems recently that im being put in situations where i am helpless to help people, because either i am far away or my help is not even thought of, or worst of all, my help is offered and rejected. its a hard thing to think about, to come to grips with: not having your life be useful... i love it that i can be here, and love people and be tehre and listen to people, but sometimes i feel like im not being used to help people the way i want to... and i am forced to think that it might be something wrong with me... that i am the one to blame for not being mroe open to being used.

i was reading in Luke the other day, and Jesus is informed by his desciples that his mother and brothers are outside the house, and he says "anyone who does the will of God is my mother and sister and brother." later he says "The work of God is this: to believe the one he has sent."

therefore if you believe in the one he sent, then you are a brother of christ... but believing in the one he has sent is HUGE! it requires everything of us...

i hope that i am being the kind of person who encourages that, encourages people to follow and believe in Christ, not be a discourager or an inhibitor.

God help us.