obituary

do you ever think about what it will be like when you die? so many people tend to wonder what people will say about them when they die, or if they have made an impact on other people, but i was just wondering what i would say to other people when i die... like, if i were to die today, what would i say to the friends and family? what would be most important? like, to mom thanks for raising me and loving me, to jeff thanks for being there, to grandparents id thank them and tell them all how much i love them, to Cass and Ash id tell them that there is a buffalo exchange in Heaven, tell david the throne of God will be made of muddy-buddies, and on and on and on... i start to wonder if people that are around me really know how much they mean to me, really understand what it is like for me to see them.

i remember how weird it was the first time a friend of mine actually asked to come along with me to do something, or made that kind of gesture, and how amazing it felt, and i really do think that people are put into other people's lives to be a blessing to them and to impact them, and i cannot put into words how much those around me have impacted me and how much i have grown because of them.

i dont know why exactly im writing this blog... this is just something that has been on my mind lately.

God is funny that way...

read this poem... i like it:

Passing Glimpse

I often see flowers from a passing car
That are gone before I can tell what they are.

I want to get out of the train and go back
To see what they were beside the track.

I name all the flowers I am sure they weren't;
Not fireweed loving where woods have burnt--

Not bluebells gracing a tunnel mouth--
Not lupine living on sand and drouth.

Was something brushed across my mind
That no one on earth will ever find?

Heaven gives its glimpses only to those
Not in position to look too close.
-Robert Frost.