ok, so i dont usually do this (i.e. repost other peoples blogs) but i thought that this was incredibly important and moving.
within the context of my day-today life, i come across a lot of people who struggle with the issue of homosexuality and sexual identity. many of these people also struggle with depression that realates to it. i came accross a blog about this that hit pretty hard, and i thought i would share it.
The following is NOT my work, and remains the property of the author.
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Christmas suicide.
December 25, 2008 |
While you are exchanging gifts today and celebrating the festivities, remember this: Today, like every day, 4 gay or lesbian youth will commit suicide.
Statistical estimations by the U.S. Health and Human Services show that 1,488 gay or lesbian youth will kill themselves in the new year. Moreover, 30% of gay or lesbian youth have contemplated suicide.
If there is one thing that pushes my heart to the breaking point, it is knowing that someone feels so alone or so scared or in so much pain that they take their own life. In a world so full of love and light, it hurts knowing that their are people in such darkness.
Today, I’d like to share a suicide note with you. It is a real note. It was written by a 16-year old high school student named Steven. He overdosed on medication. I’ve shortned the note for purposes of reproduction, but the grammer and spelling have been left intact. Here is Steven’s suicide note:
I am sorry to the people that I love but I cant fucking take it anymore. So I am gay. Why dooes everyone hate me becaus of that. Fuck them. I have been punched and spit on andcalled faggot, queer, loser, pussy, fag boy. Some asshole painted faggot on my locker. Some people do not talk to me. Fuck them, fuck everyone, I hate this fucking life know. I am so fucking tired of the shit. I hve receved hate letters telling me to leave school telling me that faggots aren’t welcome and that I am a fag.
I have wanted to be dead for so long. I don’t really know how I made it as far as thisbecase i jujst think about being dead. I am never happy. Why did so many people lie to me. I wish I never told anyone I am gay.why the fuck did I do that.
I love you mom and dad.because even though you did not undertand maybe you loved me and said I was fine and you would help me.but at school it was like being in hell. Iwas burning in hell eery day. I dould not tell you edeverythin thatwas happening. I did not want you to worryaboyut me. I coulnd not do that do you. I hope that youwill forgive me.plese forgive me. And rememberme when I was happy. And I am not a faggot I am a person that is all. Why was I a gay though, why me, why whey why why I always ask. I will never know. God must have wanted me to be with him now because he is tlling me to kill myself. I think that anywayse. And I know I need to commit suicide soon. But you need to know why. Don’t be sad. You wont have a faggot son anymore.
I need towrite a poem
i will name iti am not a fag
I am not a fag
You are the fags
Remember that
I am a person
You say faggot faggot queer queer but you don’t know anyting
I know that you are stupid assholes and that is more than you know
What is heavenreally like mom and dad. I hope it is all that not here. And don’t be sad because you will be with meagaoin. I know I know.
I am getting happier now. I am becauseit is all ending now. I want you to know that I feel good now. I think I feel really good now , yes I do. I am not crying anymore and I am rfeeling happy. I think I will be happy in heaven no longer a faggot just a person. The real faggots are tthem
I have to say goodbye now so don’t be sad. Please never be sad. I am happy. I am really happy now. Everying will be fine I am happeire that I have ever been because it is all over.
Goodbye I love you mom and dad but I hate almost everyone else. Don’t be sad.
I am happy now.
Steven survived. He was hospitalized and treated. He moved with his family to another state. Steven was lucky. But today, 4 people won’t be.
Perhaps, this Christmas, you’ll make a donation to The Trevor Project (by clicking the orange donate button on the top of the right-hand sidebar) so that they can continue to operate the nation’s only 24-hour suicide prevention helpline for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth. And please, if you are considering suicide, call 1-866-4-U-TREVOR.
All of us can do something to light the darkness.
Merry Christmas and happy holidays to you and yours.
Copyright © 2008 break the illusion www.breaktheillusion.com
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I believe that hope is to be inspired in people, no matter what.
we, as the Church specifically, and as the majority of Americans, hav done a pretty bad job of offering hope to people who need it. today, think about people you know that need help - whether its a hug or an hour of your time, try to be hope for someone.
please.
their life may depend on it.
Love all. worship one.
-Josh
Friday, December 26, 2008
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1 comment:
Let me warn u im going to cut the bs and be real in this post
Quale,
Not many people from hume know this (for obvious reasons) but im bi. Its something I struggle with every day and I've always thought that majority of if not all churches are to busy judging people instead of trying to get to know people and help them with their walk with god. Dude I know I can be partial but idk im just sick of being judged and being told to "fix it". If it was that easy I would have done it years ago. I rock two churches bc im trying to figure out where god is calling me. The main reason why my old hs youth group leader wouldnt recomend me for a position at hume this past summer was bc im bi and would be around kids!!!!! Seriously wtf is that?
People seem to think if ur not hetrosexual that u shouldn't be around kids bc of what u might do. It makes me think when the last time anyone who thinks that actually removed their heads from their rear end and took the time to get to know some one that is gay bi what ever. Thanks for posting that. Just maybe it will open peoples eyes to how hard it is. But hey I will let u go. Please hit me up sometime 702.353.6373 or chssoccerbigj(aim)
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