-------------------------
Joshua Quale
Pastor to Students
Huntington Beach Baptist Church
Cell: (951) 852-4232
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Push the button, grab the bacon!
A foreign couple is changing their baby right in the middle of starbucks.
Can you say "Staff infection"??
-------------------------
Joshua Quale
Pastor to Students
Huntington Beach Baptist Church
Cell: (951) 852-4232
Monday, May 18, 2009
Heading upto Liberty Island.
Send me your tired, your poor
Your hurdeled masses longing to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the Homeless, tempest-tossed to me. I lift my lamp besidethe Golden door.
Your hurdeled masses longing to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the Homeless, tempest-tossed to me. I lift my lamp besidethe Golden door.
-------------------------
Joshua Quale
Pastor to Students
Huntington Beach Baptist Church
Cell: (951) 852-4232
CVUSC Concert Choir at the Cathedral Church of St. John the Divine
Vanguard Universities Concert Choir performing Caritas Et Amor at the Cathedral Church of St. John the Divine, New york Tour 2009
Vanguard University Concert Choir performing "My Soul's been Anchored in the Lord" arr. Moses Hogan at The Cathedral Church of St. John the Divine
I can feel my arteries clogging as I'm eating this. Yummm
-------------------------
Joshua Quale
Pastor to Students
Huntington Beach Baptist Church
Cell: (951) 852-4232
Saturday, May 16, 2009
About to get on the subway- with Jayde and Jenny red head
-------------------------
Joshua Quale
Pastor to Students
Huntington Beach Baptist Church
Cell: (951) 852-4232
Chillin at starbucks on w. 57th.
-------------------------
Joshua Quale
Pastor to Students
Huntington Beach Baptist Church
Cell: (951) 852-4232
Free Starbucks Wifi, #1
Im going to be calling these updates "Free Starbucks Wifi" because they dont have free Wifi at the hotel we are staying at, but i get it *free* at Starbucks, with my gold card.
heres some pics from yesterday, of the drive to the airport, the plane and waiting. and more... waiting.
enjoy!
(click to enlarge)
heres some pics from yesterday, of the drive to the airport, the plane and waiting. and more... waiting.
enjoy!
(click to enlarge)
Friday, May 15, 2009
Check out my New York updates!
Hey everyone! I'm writing from the tunnel, heading into New York city!
Just wanted to let you know you can follow my adventures around the city by going to
Www.Twitter.com/qualeman
Enjoy your night!
-Josh
Just wanted to let you know you can follow my adventures around the city by going to
Www.Twitter.com/qualeman
Enjoy your night!
-Josh
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Baptist Pastor Tasered and beaten, forced from his car
A baptist pastor was tasered, beaten and taken forcefully from his vehicle by California Highway Patrolman. The pastor refused to get out of the car until he was given the charges, and after asking repeatedly, he was told he was being arrested for resisting arrest. (??)
watch the video of his arrest and what took place here:
and his comments before THAT video was made:
what do you think? who was in the wrong?
wow... this sucks.
It slipped in... Fish found in boy's penis:
A 2cm long fish apparently found it's way into the penis of a 14-year-old boy from India in a bizarre medical case.
The patient was admitted to hospital with complaints of pain, dribbling urine and acute urinary retention spanning a 24-hour period. According to the boy, the fish slipped into his penis while he was cleaning his aquarium at home.
Professor Vezhaventhan and Professor Jeyaraman, who treated the boy and later wrote a paper on the case, explained: "While he was cleaning the fish tank in his house, he was holding a fish in his hand and went to the toilet for passing urine. When he was passing urine, the fish slipped from his hand and entered his urethra and then he developed all these symptoms."
A 2cm long fish apparently found it's way into the penis of a 14-year-old boy from India in a bizarre medical case.
The patient was admitted to hospital with complaints of pain, dribbling urine and acute urinary retention spanning a 24-hour period. According to the boy, the fish slipped into his penis while he was cleaning his aquarium at home.
Professor Vezhaventhan and Professor Jeyaraman, who treated the boy and later wrote a paper on the case, explained: "While he was cleaning the fish tank in his house, he was holding a fish in his hand and went to the toilet for passing urine. When he was passing urine, the fish slipped from his hand and entered his urethra and then he developed all these symptoms."
"He was later admitted into counseling to help him overcome any trauma."
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Pastors Life, #1
LEave some love with 5 stars!
Josh's Blog:
http://qualeman.blogspot.com
Atlantis links with Hubble:
http://tinyurl.com/pfhkjg
One Month to Live Survey:
http://tinyurl.com/cad83t
HBBC Student Ministry Website:
http://tinyurl.com/odee69
the Not-So-Extreme-Sports-Club:
http://tinyurl.com/pr2ooa
Un-Noticed News:
The Pheromone-Immiting Seduction Ring:
http://tinyurl.com/orhgue
Lego's Sunglasses:
http://tinyurl.com/dhcl6q
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Saturday, May 09, 2009
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
Mini Book Review- Me, Myself and Bob.
Im waiting now for a book that I ordered called "Me, Myself and Bob", the story of Phil Vischer, the creator of VeggieTales. I have read this before, but have lost it (big surprise).
This is an incredible story of a man who had a dream and saw the dream come to life, and then saw the dream die right in front of him, and he couldnt doa nything about it.
A man who has tasted defeat, learned what was important and came out with a better understanding of what it means to be "crucified with Christ". If you are going into the business arena, into ministry, leadership of any kind, or if you just plain have dreams at all, this is a MUST read!
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
"I Know My Girl" from The Unauthorized Autobiography of Samantha Brown"
Heres a clip of the song "I Know My Girl" from the Unauthorized Autobiography of Samantha Brown at OCPAC.
This reminds me of a good friend and her mom SO MUCH its not even funny.
The Characters are: Sam, Her mom, Her boyfriend and Her Dad. Sam is a girl about to graduate high school, and her mom is wondering why she never tells her anything.
AWESOME!
I Love this!
-Josh
Monday, May 04, 2009
Things to think about
From bits & pieces
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes..
Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive.
There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.
Life is sexually transmitted.
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?”
Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken there? I’m gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt.”
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Sunday, May 03, 2009
Teenage Daughter...
ON HER THIRTEENTH BIRTHDAY
Congratulations! You are now the proud new owner of a teenage daughter. Please read this manual carefully, as it describes the maintenance of your new daughter, and answers important questions about your warranty, which does NOT include the right to return the ‘product’ to the factory for a full refund.
IF YOU FEEL YOU HAVE RECEIVED YOUR TEENAGER IN ERROR:
To determine whether you were supposed to receive a teenage girl, please examine your new daughter carefully. Does she:
(a) look very similar to your original daughter, only with more makeup and less clothing?
(b) refuse to acknowledge your existence on the planet Earth (except when requesting money)?
(c) sleep in a burrow of dirty laundry?
If any of these are true, you have received the correct item.
BREAK-IN PERIOD:
When you first receive your teenage daughter, you will initially experience a high level of discomfort. Gradually, this discomfort will subside, and you will merely feel traumatized. This is the “Break-In Period,” during which you are becoming accustomed to certain behaviors that will cause you concern, anxiety, and stress. One you have adapted to these behaviors, your teenager will start acting even worse.
ACTIVATION:
To activate your teenage daughter, simply place her in the vicinity of a telephone or Instant Messenger. No further programming is required.
SHUTDOWN:
Several hours after activation, you may desire to shut down your teenaged daughter. There is no way to do this.
CLEANING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER:
Having a teenage daughter means learning the difference between the words “clean” and “neat.” Teenage daughters are very clean, because they take frequent showers that last more than an hour. They will scrub themselves with expensive, fragrant soaps which you must purchase for them because “like I’m sure I’m going to use like the same kind of soap my mom and dad use.” When they have completely drained the hot-water tank, they will step out & wrap themselves in every towel in the bathroom, which they will subsequently strew throughout the house. If you ask them to pick up the towels, you are confusing “clean” with “neat.” Teenagers are very busy & don’t have time to be neat. They expect others to pick up after them. These ‘others’ are called “parents.”
FEEDING YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER:
Your teenage daughter requires regular meals, which must be purchased for her at restaurants because she detests everything you eat because “it is like so disgusting.” She doesn’t want you to accompany her to these restaurants, because some people might see you and, “like I’m sure I want my friends to see me eating dinner with my parents”. Either order take-out food or just give her the money. If you order pizza, never answer the doorbell because the delivery boy might see you and, “ohmigod he is so hot!” Yes, your daughter’s idea of an attractive man is the pizza boy.
CLOTHING YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER:
Retailers make millions of dollars a year selling stylish and frankly, sensible clothing which will look adorable on your daughter. If you enjoy shopping, you will love the vast selections which are available to you. Unfortunately, your teenage daughter wants to dress like a lap dancer. You may be able to coerce her into putting on a cute outfit before leaving the house, but by the time she walks in the school door, she will be wearing something entirely different.
OTHER MAINTENANCE:
Teenage daughters require one or two levels of maintenance: “high,” and “ultra high.” Of course, YOUR daughter is “ultra high”. This means that whatever you do won’t be enough, and whatever you try, won’t work.
WARRANTY:
This product is not without defect because she has “your” genes, for heaven’s sake! If you think this is not fair, talk to your parents, who think it is hilarious. Your teenage daughter will remain a teenager for as long as it takes for her to become a woman; which in her opinion, has already happened, and as far as you are concerned, never really will. If you are dissatisfied with your teenage daughter, well, what did you expect? In any event, your warranty does not give you your little girl back under any circumstances, except that deep down she’s actually still there - you just have to look for her. Go ahead, try it-you just might find her!
Congratulations! You are now the proud new owner of a teenage daughter. Please read this manual carefully, as it describes the maintenance of your new daughter, and answers important questions about your warranty, which does NOT include the right to return the ‘product’ to the factory for a full refund.
IF YOU FEEL YOU HAVE RECEIVED YOUR TEENAGER IN ERROR:
To determine whether you were supposed to receive a teenage girl, please examine your new daughter carefully. Does she:
(a) look very similar to your original daughter, only with more makeup and less clothing?
(b) refuse to acknowledge your existence on the planet Earth (except when requesting money)?
(c) sleep in a burrow of dirty laundry?
If any of these are true, you have received the correct item.
BREAK-IN PERIOD:
When you first receive your teenage daughter, you will initially experience a high level of discomfort. Gradually, this discomfort will subside, and you will merely feel traumatized. This is the “Break-In Period,” during which you are becoming accustomed to certain behaviors that will cause you concern, anxiety, and stress. One you have adapted to these behaviors, your teenager will start acting even worse.
ACTIVATION:
To activate your teenage daughter, simply place her in the vicinity of a telephone or Instant Messenger. No further programming is required.
SHUTDOWN:
Several hours after activation, you may desire to shut down your teenaged daughter. There is no way to do this.
CLEANING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER:
Having a teenage daughter means learning the difference between the words “clean” and “neat.” Teenage daughters are very clean, because they take frequent showers that last more than an hour. They will scrub themselves with expensive, fragrant soaps which you must purchase for them because “like I’m sure I’m going to use like the same kind of soap my mom and dad use.” When they have completely drained the hot-water tank, they will step out & wrap themselves in every towel in the bathroom, which they will subsequently strew throughout the house. If you ask them to pick up the towels, you are confusing “clean” with “neat.” Teenagers are very busy & don’t have time to be neat. They expect others to pick up after them. These ‘others’ are called “parents.”
FEEDING YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER:
Your teenage daughter requires regular meals, which must be purchased for her at restaurants because she detests everything you eat because “it is like so disgusting.” She doesn’t want you to accompany her to these restaurants, because some people might see you and, “like I’m sure I want my friends to see me eating dinner with my parents”. Either order take-out food or just give her the money. If you order pizza, never answer the doorbell because the delivery boy might see you and, “ohmigod he is so hot!” Yes, your daughter’s idea of an attractive man is the pizza boy.
CLOTHING YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER:
Retailers make millions of dollars a year selling stylish and frankly, sensible clothing which will look adorable on your daughter. If you enjoy shopping, you will love the vast selections which are available to you. Unfortunately, your teenage daughter wants to dress like a lap dancer. You may be able to coerce her into putting on a cute outfit before leaving the house, but by the time she walks in the school door, she will be wearing something entirely different.
OTHER MAINTENANCE:
Teenage daughters require one or two levels of maintenance: “high,” and “ultra high.” Of course, YOUR daughter is “ultra high”. This means that whatever you do won’t be enough, and whatever you try, won’t work.
WARRANTY:
This product is not without defect because she has “your” genes, for heaven’s sake! If you think this is not fair, talk to your parents, who think it is hilarious. Your teenage daughter will remain a teenager for as long as it takes for her to become a woman; which in her opinion, has already happened, and as far as you are concerned, never really will. If you are dissatisfied with your teenage daughter, well, what did you expect? In any event, your warranty does not give you your little girl back under any circumstances, except that deep down she’s actually still there - you just have to look for her. Go ahead, try it-you just might find her!
Saturday, May 02, 2009
Friday, May 01, 2009
how to make a baby
Sooo....
im not sure if this IS how you make a baby... but if not, I'd like to think it cant be more fun than this!
im not sure if this IS how you make a baby... but if not, I'd like to think it cant be more fun than this!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
ER Workers call 911 to assist patient outside their door
This week, a builder in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada informed the City Hospital Emergency Room staff that a man in a hospital gown had just collapsed outside the door. The man was within feet of the ER and was in obvious need of help.
Leaping to action, a member of the ER staff called 911. The 911 dispatcher called an ambulance. After a 4 to 6 minute wait, the ambulance arrived.
The ER staff made no attempt to step outside the door to look at the man, assess his needs or help him. That sort of emergency is something that emergency workers wouldn't handle. Rather than help, they chose to call 911 to assist a man they could see through the doors.
Fortunately, before the ambulance arrived, security guards did the logical thing-- they helped the man into the ER. Were it not for the security staff, the ambulance workers would have had to do the job.
According to Patti Simonar, director of emergency and critical care services for the region, what the ER staff did was standard procedure. After all, having the ER staff to go outside the door creates a risk for the patient (?) and staff.
In a similar incident, back in 2006, Ron Bitz arrived at the hospital ER 10 minutes before it opened (9:00 am) suffering from a heart attack. He was not allowed to come in. Rather, an ambulance was called. The rescue workers worked on him until 9 and then carried him into the ER.
LINK HERE
Leaping to action, a member of the ER staff called 911. The 911 dispatcher called an ambulance. After a 4 to 6 minute wait, the ambulance arrived.
The ER staff made no attempt to step outside the door to look at the man, assess his needs or help him. That sort of emergency is something that emergency workers wouldn't handle. Rather than help, they chose to call 911 to assist a man they could see through the doors.
Fortunately, before the ambulance arrived, security guards did the logical thing-- they helped the man into the ER. Were it not for the security staff, the ambulance workers would have had to do the job.
According to Patti Simonar, director of emergency and critical care services for the region, what the ER staff did was standard procedure. After all, having the ER staff to go outside the door creates a risk for the patient (?) and staff.
In a similar incident, back in 2006, Ron Bitz arrived at the hospital ER 10 minutes before it opened (9:00 am) suffering from a heart attack. He was not allowed to come in. Rather, an ambulance was called. The rescue workers worked on him until 9 and then carried him into the ER.
LINK HERE
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
A New favorite Vlogger on YOuTube
SOOOO....
I was wondering around Youtube recently, as I am known to do, and I came across the guy Tyler... and He is now my favorite Vlogger on YouTube.
Take a look:
I was wondering around Youtube recently, as I am known to do, and I came across the guy Tyler... and He is now my favorite Vlogger on YouTube.
Take a look:
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
The Groaner Foul
In comedySportz, a sketch comedy show in Los Angeles, CA, there is what has come to be called "The Groaner Foul"- a foul given when there is bad, cheesy comedy that usually results in a loss of points from the team that committed the heinous crime.
I found these to be about the same comedic weight and deserving of "The Groaner Foul"-
Take a Look: Some Punny stuff
1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.
2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”
3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
4. A dyslexic man walked into a bra.
5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm, and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.”
6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”
7. “Doc, I can’t stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home.”
“That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.”
“Is it common?”
“Well, It’s Not Unusual.”
8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.”
“I don’t believe you,” says Dolly.
“It’s true; no bull!” exclaims Daisy.
9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.
11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn’t find any.
12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, “Doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!” The doctor replied, “I know, I amputated your arms!”
13. I went to a seafood disco last week… and pulled a mussel.
14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish.
15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, “Dam!”
16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the raft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.
17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel, and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them to disperse.
“But why,” they asked, as they moved off.
“Because,” he said. “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”
18. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt , and is named “Ahmal.” The other goes to a family in Spain ; they name him “Juan.” Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, “They’re twins! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal.”
19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
20. A dwarf, who was a mystic, escaped from jail. The call went out that there was a small medium at large.
21. And finally, there was the person who posted twenty different puns for his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
From Bits & Pieces
I found these to be about the same comedic weight and deserving of "The Groaner Foul"-
Take a Look: Some Punny stuff
1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.
2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”
3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
4. A dyslexic man walked into a bra.
5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm, and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.”
6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”
7. “Doc, I can’t stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home.”
“That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.”
“Is it common?”
“Well, It’s Not Unusual.”
8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.”
“I don’t believe you,” says Dolly.
“It’s true; no bull!” exclaims Daisy.
9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.
11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn’t find any.
12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, “Doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!” The doctor replied, “I know, I amputated your arms!”
13. I went to a seafood disco last week… and pulled a mussel.
14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish.
15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, “Dam!”
16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the raft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.
17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel, and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them to disperse.
“But why,” they asked, as they moved off.
“Because,” he said. “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”
18. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt , and is named “Ahmal.” The other goes to a family in Spain ; they name him “Juan.” Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, “They’re twins! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal.”
19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
20. A dwarf, who was a mystic, escaped from jail. The call went out that there was a small medium at large.
21. And finally, there was the person who posted twenty different puns for his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
From Bits & Pieces
The end of a Golden age!
I read a few days ago that Bea Arthur, Dorothy on the Golden Girls, past away. I remember watching this show with my grandma when i was little-
Heres some classic bloopers from The Golden Girls
Kissamee
A man and his wife were driving their Recreational Vehicle across the country and were nearing a town spelled Kissimmee. They noted the strange spelling and tried to figure how to pronounce it - KISS-a-me; kis-A-me; kis-a-ME. They grew more perplexed as they drove into the town.
Since they were hungry, they pulled into a place to get something to eat. At the counter, the man said to the waitress: “My wife and I can’t seem to be able to figure out how to pronounce this place. Will you tell me where we are and say it very slowly so that I can understand.”
The waitress looked at him and said: “Buuurrrgerrr Kiiiinnnng.”
Monday, April 27, 2009
Eeyore
I've Always felt a kindred spirit with Eeyore. Which... is odd because im not a donkey (although i do identify with democrats most of the time) and I'm not made out of cloth (although i feel fragile a lot)... but I think I feel like him more often than not.
His catch-phrase sinks deep with me- "Thanks for noticing me..."- Often I feel like the odd-man out, the person who's only noticed when they get tripped over or hurt someone else inadvertently.
Recently, though, there's been an interesting shift in my world-view paradigm. I used to think about christianity in reference to summer camps. It sounds weird, but hang on with me- At summer camp they usually have decision nights, where they have everyone close their eyes and bow their heads and say something like:
"... and if you're ready to do that, I'm going to count to three and I want you to stand up..."
And your palms start to sweat,
and the chair is feeling extra comfortable for some reason,
but you feel like you SHOULD stand up...
and the man at the front says "...ONE..."
and you DO feel ready to do what their asking...
but its awkward...
and your stomache is in your shoes...
and the chair sucking you into itself...
and the man at the front says "...TWO..."
and you think:
"ok...
im just gonna do it....
im just gonna stand up....
but, wait....
i dont REALLY have to stand up...
do I?....
but i should stand....
uuhhhhh......"
Your hands are now cradling a pool of sweat in each palm,
and the man at the front says "...three."
the shuffling sounds of feet moving and chairs squeaking fill the room...
and there you are.
They usually have three nights like this-
One night for new dedications, saying for the first time "yes" to the call to follow Christ,
One night for RE-dedications to follow Christ, because this time you really mean it! (or, you really, really mean it, depending on whether its your second, third, eighth re-dedication...)
and then one night to dedicate your life if you feel called into ministry.
And I used to put all christians into these categories- You have your new Christians, beginning their journey. You have your "re-dedication" Christians, who are still struggling with making a clear decision and sticking to it, and then you have these people who are called into ministry- and these were the REAL Christians, the ones who were closest to Christ, selling out their lives to go into ministry for the Kingdom!
And i thought, in the back of my head, that this is what Christianity looked like- you are new, then you re-dedicate until you get it... and when you are ready, you are called into your ministry, and you are given the keys to the Kingdom- you have finally reached the PINNACLE of Following Christ.
And I remember when I first started serving in ministry- I felt like i was "ahead of the game" like I had "gotten it", you know? I finally got into serving in ministry and I was THERE! YES! Sure, its gonna be hard, but i've finally made it! Ive found my ministry! Im serving! IM HERE!
and then.... that part of my life stopped causing me total euphoria, and I started to feel stagnant... and started to ask myself
"well... now what?"
I began talking about this stuff with a friend and counselor, Tim Young, and He said something that changed everything: "Well, Josh... above using us to change lives, Christ came to TRANSFORM our lives. Jesus cares FAR MORE about the relationship with you and the wholeness of your life than the ministry that you can do."
and it hit me...
If we view Christianity is a way thats always how WE can help OTHERS, and how WE can help transform THEIR life, and how WE can work together to help MORE people... suddenly our Christianity is about nothing more than US and THEM, with hardly and mention of God anywhere.
oh sure, we end up placing WWJD bracelets on our wrists, and we have bumper stickers that say "Jesus Loves You!" but all to often we follow that up with "Follow me to Southland Christian Church!" and it becomes about what WE can do for THEM.
But when we start taking the idea of Christianity and make it about you and me, Jesus becomes a by-product of OUR work... but shouldn't our ministry to others be a byproduct of Jesus transformation in our own lives?
The call of Christ is more than just a call to say "YES" to Him, its more than a call to serve in a ministry, its more than a call to get married or a job or go to a certain school- above ALL else, Christ calls us to wholeness.
and this shifted EVERYTHING for me.
Above ANYTHING else... Christ wants to make us whole, complete people.
WOW!
Its been an interesting shift in my mindset recently... and now, the summer camp view of Christianity is gone- and now instead of attempting to convert EVERYONE i see, I'm praying for God to transform MY life, and that out of that transformation that He may use me every day to help people become more fully themselves, continually understanding that they can ONLY become more fully themselves in Christ.
So- I still feel like Eeyore from time to time, but I now know that Gods ultimate purpose in my life is to help bring me to wholeness... and to use me in bringing others to wholeness as well.
His catch-phrase sinks deep with me- "Thanks for noticing me..."- Often I feel like the odd-man out, the person who's only noticed when they get tripped over or hurt someone else inadvertently.
Recently, though, there's been an interesting shift in my world-view paradigm. I used to think about christianity in reference to summer camps. It sounds weird, but hang on with me- At summer camp they usually have decision nights, where they have everyone close their eyes and bow their heads and say something like:
"... and if you're ready to do that, I'm going to count to three and I want you to stand up..."
And your palms start to sweat,
and the chair is feeling extra comfortable for some reason,
but you feel like you SHOULD stand up...
and the man at the front says "...ONE..."
and you DO feel ready to do what their asking...
but its awkward...
and your stomache is in your shoes...
and the chair sucking you into itself...
and the man at the front says "...TWO..."
and you think:
"ok...
im just gonna do it....
im just gonna stand up....
but, wait....
i dont REALLY have to stand up...
do I?....
but i should stand....
uuhhhhh......"
Your hands are now cradling a pool of sweat in each palm,
and the man at the front says "...three."
the shuffling sounds of feet moving and chairs squeaking fill the room...
and there you are.
They usually have three nights like this-
One night for new dedications, saying for the first time "yes" to the call to follow Christ,
One night for RE-dedications to follow Christ, because this time you really mean it! (or, you really, really mean it, depending on whether its your second, third, eighth re-dedication...)
and then one night to dedicate your life if you feel called into ministry.
And I used to put all christians into these categories- You have your new Christians, beginning their journey. You have your "re-dedication" Christians, who are still struggling with making a clear decision and sticking to it, and then you have these people who are called into ministry- and these were the REAL Christians, the ones who were closest to Christ, selling out their lives to go into ministry for the Kingdom!
And i thought, in the back of my head, that this is what Christianity looked like- you are new, then you re-dedicate until you get it... and when you are ready, you are called into your ministry, and you are given the keys to the Kingdom- you have finally reached the PINNACLE of Following Christ.
And I remember when I first started serving in ministry- I felt like i was "ahead of the game" like I had "gotten it", you know? I finally got into serving in ministry and I was THERE! YES! Sure, its gonna be hard, but i've finally made it! Ive found my ministry! Im serving! IM HERE!
and then.... that part of my life stopped causing me total euphoria, and I started to feel stagnant... and started to ask myself
"well... now what?"
I began talking about this stuff with a friend and counselor, Tim Young, and He said something that changed everything: "Well, Josh... above using us to change lives, Christ came to TRANSFORM our lives. Jesus cares FAR MORE about the relationship with you and the wholeness of your life than the ministry that you can do."
and it hit me...
If we view Christianity is a way thats always how WE can help OTHERS, and how WE can help transform THEIR life, and how WE can work together to help MORE people... suddenly our Christianity is about nothing more than US and THEM, with hardly and mention of God anywhere.
oh sure, we end up placing WWJD bracelets on our wrists, and we have bumper stickers that say "Jesus Loves You!" but all to often we follow that up with "Follow me to Southland Christian Church!" and it becomes about what WE can do for THEM.
But when we start taking the idea of Christianity and make it about you and me, Jesus becomes a by-product of OUR work... but shouldn't our ministry to others be a byproduct of Jesus transformation in our own lives?
The call of Christ is more than just a call to say "YES" to Him, its more than a call to serve in a ministry, its more than a call to get married or a job or go to a certain school- above ALL else, Christ calls us to wholeness.
and this shifted EVERYTHING for me.
Above ANYTHING else... Christ wants to make us whole, complete people.
WOW!
Its been an interesting shift in my mindset recently... and now, the summer camp view of Christianity is gone- and now instead of attempting to convert EVERYONE i see, I'm praying for God to transform MY life, and that out of that transformation that He may use me every day to help people become more fully themselves, continually understanding that they can ONLY become more fully themselves in Christ.
So- I still feel like Eeyore from time to time, but I now know that Gods ultimate purpose in my life is to help bring me to wholeness... and to use me in bringing others to wholeness as well.
Current Results
I asked people a few days ago to answer a POLL that asked "If you only had one month to live, what would you do?"
Here are the Current Results:
To me, this shows how much we value relationships over almost everything else.
To take the poll, simply click HERE!
Thanks for your help!
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Run Away With Me
OK, so I've been going CRAZY over a new musical I heard about called "The Unauthorized Biography of Samantha Brown" By Kerrigan and Lowdermilk.
I have found this video through a friend of mine, and its DEFINATELY my favorite song from the show, and I love this guys take on the song... you can FEEL the awkwardness and determination coming out of him- take a look:
"Michael Arden sings "Run Away With Me" from "the Unauthorized Biography of Samantha Brown" as an encore to "Tales from the Bad Years" written by Kait Kerrigan and Brian Lowdermilk"
Thought-Provoking.
"Unintentionally, we [the church] have invited people to meet a safe God"- Craig Groeschel
Carrie Fisher ROASTS George Lucas
Carrie Fisher Gives us a little peek into what it was like working with George Lucas at his Celebrity Roast.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
For Kevin (the babe)
(i have no idea what this means, but ill bet you KTB can read it in about 20 seconds... and then prove it.)
A Mac-vs-PC Add from 1996. Why? Why not?!
(Click image to enlarge)
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